The 7 laws of the Metaverse in 2022

The only thing known about the metaverse is that no one knows what exactly it is. The funny thing is that everyone (including me) is talking about it. We all claim to know what the metaverse is, but in reality we have no idea.

However, countless articles have been written on the subject, which even the author of the 7 Laws of the Metaverse does not know, let alone his readers. Many presentations at events have been made in the metaverse, with speakers talking about this future technology while speaking automatically, like mechanical monkeys playing cymbals. In reality, everyone repeats what others say on the metaverse in hopes of better understanding what it is, but in fact, the more you read about this subject, the less you know.

The metaverse is everything and nothing at the same time, and above all nothing.

Consequence #1.1. “A” or “the” metaverse: an indefinite article.

Do we say ” a metaverse “” Where ” the metaverse »? No one knows. But if you choose one of these two options, you have the right to hate all the people who chose the other option. According to the latest metaverse community guidelines, if someone uses the word metaverse with a post you don’t like on social media, you have a duty to start a comment war.

During this time, outside our bubble people don’t even differentiate between augmented reality (AR), virtual reality (VR), metaverse and a potato peeler. But back to the topic. By the way, it is worth remembering that everyone agrees on that the potato peeler is the most useful of the 4 technologies described above.

Consequence #1.2. The metaverse has characteristics that even the metaverse ignores

Since no one knows what the metaverse is, we have to say what we think about it when we talk about it, especially when we want to make people dream about the future. Thus, you can declare that in the metaverse you can meet people from all over the world, anytime and anywhere. You can dream of the future of immersive education, when little kids in school will have immersive history lessons where they can go and watch medieval battles in virtual reality, so they can watch people tear each other apart and be traumatized forever (but at least they will never forget what they saw, proving that VR has a great capacity for memory). You can talk about flying cars. You can imagine free health care or giant robots with laser eyes that can roam everywhere.

Everything is allowed in this regard. You can talk about the metaverse the way a politician talks about what he wants to do in the next 5 years if elected: Say what you want with confidence and a smile, knowing that nothing you say will come true .

At the end of the day, remember to tell yourself that the world is getting better thanks to the metaverse.

Consequence #1.3. Metaverse is everything, everything is metaverse

There is no definition of the “metaverse” or its characteristics or its boundaries. So anything can be defined as metaverse. Forget all the boring names that identify everything precisely: If ” metaverse is the buzzword of the moment, you have a duty to define everything that exists in relation to it. Especially if it’s your product. If someone asks you to sell a pen in 2022, pretend the pen is a metaverse.

Remember: everything is a sex toy if you are brave enough to claim it, and everything is a metaverse if you believe it enough.

To know how to properly talk about the metaverse, you can take inspiration from South Park, especially the episode where the kids land on the planet Marklar, where everything and everyone is called Marklar. Replace Marklar with metaverse and you’ll have the perfect technological sesame to talk about.

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